But I happily wandered up and down the aisles of my local store, filling my cart with all kinds of treasures. Things full of partially hydrogenated oil and high fructose corn syrup. Things that probably cause cancer and diabetes. You know, things that taste really good.
And while there, I had me some samples.
I had some of these:
And I had some of this (which I buy on a regular basis and love):
And I even had some of this, and although delicious, I did not buy it. I prefer my wasteful calories in cookie dough form.
I was tempted to have some of this, but the sample table was too crowded. Lots of old men in cowboy hats dying for a miniature bite of a pizza bagel.
But it was all right. I was already full from my chips and cream puffs.
But the one sample that I was not even remotely tempted to taste was this:
Yes, they were sampling DOG FOOD at my Sam's today.
In sample cups.
For people to taste, I presume, since no dogs shop at my Sam's on a regular basis.
You know, seeing as how they don't drive or take the bus. Because THEY'RE DOGS.
Has the world gone mad and I just don't know it? Please explain this to me. Why would they sample the dog food?
I just don't get it.