War games

Right now my kids are playing their favorite game - World War II. The boys have recently become obsessed with the details of World War II. They ask questions like, "Just how many trenches did the soldiers dig?" and constantly want to know exactly which country was on "our" side. Every day after school and homework, they load up their backpacks, grab their wooden rifles, and recreate the trenches in our living room. Bombs are detonated, generals are saluted, and food is rationed. Hannah is the nurse-in-residence, and does her best to bandage up the wounded men. Every book Chase brings home from the library lately seems to be related to some aspect of World War II.

I love that they've taken a real interest in history and feel no need to step in and end their violent imaginary play. (Although we have spent a great deal of time focusing on the fact that Germany is now our friend, and we love all German people - a truth they cheerfully accept).

It has only become a little embarrassing at the park, however, when they yell ever-so-loudly, "Look out, it's a German. Kill him! Kill him!"

But I bury my nose in my book, try to look the other way, and make sure to call Oma and Opa when we get home and have a good laugh about it.

Wonder what we'll be into next?

Always look on the bright side...

So in preparation for the Great Move of 2007, we are now a one-car family. We waved goodbye to Josh's car at the transport parking lot last week. We could have rented a car, but we really felt like it was silly. It's only for two weeks - ten total school days. I mean, come on, he works like ten minutes from here, and the kids force me to pick them up on foot from school anyway, so why spend the money? There have been moments it's been a little painful, but I thought I'd make a list citing all the positive things about not having a car:

1. I am forced into getting more exercise (because 45 minutes on the treadmill is never enough to cancel out my predilection for cookie dough).
2. All that cookie dough I am fond of eating just might get burned off instead of turning to lard on my thighs.
3. I get loads of fresh air (that is also unfortunately chock-full of pollen, sigh).
4. My heart gets a workout when I nearly go into cardiac arrest every time a lizard darts out in front of the stroller (which averages about 17 times each day).
5. My calves get a workout when I am forced to suddenly stop so I don't run over Chase who has dumped his scooter to try and catch said lizards (also about 17 times each day).
6. I am much more agile when dodging the SUVs and seven-series BMWs driven maniacally by the high school students than I would be in a car.
7. My freckles are multiplying due to all my time walking out in the sun (I am hoping this brings me closer to my goal of someday having them merge into one giant freckle, thus ridding me of them entirely).
8. My kids are running, scootering, and biking every day.
9. It gives McKay and I lots of quality time to discuss weapons and video games.
10. I have no fear of getting speeding tickets (course, truth be told, I am not the one in our family who is known to speed).
11. It keeps me out of the mall and prevents me from spending all my husband's money (which according to Stiesta-Economics, nets us a profit this week of $400 by virtue of my not spending what I would have spent).
12. I get time to listen and answer all 4,509 questions Hannah has floating around her head.
13. We're helping the environment by not using up all the extra gas it would take to cart Josh back and forth to work (which really makes Chase one happy little camper).

Mating in the Lord's House?

Said by Chase in the middle of church today after he pulled two small, plastic frogs out of his shirt pocket:

"Mom, see these frogs? This one is a male; this one is a female. This is how they mate. The male gets on top of the female like this..."

"Uh, that's great, Chase. I just don't know if this is the best time for that. Let's put the frogs away....um'kay?"

"But it's what THEY DO!"

"Yes, I'm sure it's what they do; they just don't do it in church."

Not old enough

Chase came running in, breathless, to find me. "Mom, you HAVE to get this thing I just saw on t.v. It is SO IMPORTANT."

"Okay, Chase. What is it?" (Thinking it was some must-have toy).

"It's this new thing that will protect you. It's called Life Alert. If you fall on the ground or have a heart attack - IT WILL CALL THE FIRE DEPARTMENT FOR YOU. You need this, Mom. It even says if you have diet beating. " (I think he means diabetes, because I am not by any means beating my diet like I should be).

"Wow, Chase. That sounds great. But I don't really think we need that just yet."

McKay smugly walks into the room, "See, Chase, I told you that was for way old people. Mom's not old enough yet."

So glad I have a few years before I need Life Alert, and glad that when I finally do, Chase will hook me up.

Things I've learned this week

• I AM an anti-dentite. I know that now.
• When it is spring vacation and we are off school for a whole week, one or more of the kids will ALWAYS get sick.
• Their germs will, without fail, infect me and I will get sick.
• I really do hate the dentist. (Have I mentioned my dental hatred yet? Have I?)
• Not being able to chew because of sore teeth would take me to a very mean place were it not for the soft, chewy goodness of Reeses Peanut Butter eggs.
• Which I vow to stop eating.
• Tomorrow, I promise.
• I can lose hours dreaming of my scrapbook room in the new house.
• Dropping Josh's car off at the car transport place will make this move seem like actual reality. Which means I've got a lot of junk to get throwing away.
• Make sure to clarify with the kids about the ACTUAL timing of the move. Otherwise, Chase will tell his entire class goodbye on the Friday before spring break. A few panicked mothers will call to check on us.
• A bag of clay makes Chase ever-so-happy. (Note to self: Stop stifling his creativity with your laziness).
• Favorite thing this week: Warm chocolate chip cookies and walks with my kids.
• Best quote this week from Josh: "I'm so tired of genital herpes." (No, he doesn't have them, but he's sick of seeing the commercials on t.v. for it).

My brother, the man

Had a little conversation with my brother, Daniel, the other day. We were chatting along, calling each other names (as per our usual) and he mentioned the new car he just bought.

Oh. No. He. Didn't.

(He did)

He has joined the ranks of families everywhere who find their kids' car seats no longer fit in the backseat of their previously-spacious cars. He bought a minivan.

I proceeded to give him grief about such a choice (what are sisters for?) and he started to launch into the virtues of owning such a vehicle. How they were getting it fitted with a DVD player for the kids. How they will have room for the third car seat for the new baby in a few months. How he can now just basically hand all the pants in his closet over to his wife (as clearly she will be wearing the pants in their family).

He retorted with just how comfortable his van is to ride in. That, sure, he wasn't in favor of it at first, but now what with all the comfort.

I replied, "Yeah, well, moo-moos are comfortable, too, and you don't see me walking around town in one."

So, Daniel, enjoy your new Moo-Moo (as that is what I will forever call any car that you drive). And when you are driving to JC Penny for some must-have fall fashions, and you look down to realize you've chipped a nail while plugging in Veggie Tales for the children, and simultaneously you're choking up listening to your favorite Celine Dion CD, just relish in your comfort. For you are a man. A real man.

A man who gave up looking cool so his wife would be happy.

And that, my dear brother, makes you a better man than you will ever know. (But I will be forced to still make fun of you, sorry).