Sometimes, the morning gods smile upon me

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The alarm clock goes off, rousing me from a disturbingly-realistic dream in which I own two pet tigers that I am terrified will eat me (thank you, Celia and Paige. I blame you for all the tiger talk). I look around and remember that I don't really have any tigers. I lay my head back on the pillow and sigh in relief.

I stumble for my glasses and peek to see if the sun is out. It is starting to rise over the rooftops and slant across the yard in sharp angles. The frost on the grass glitters like diamonds. It looks beautiful. It looks cold.

I struggle to remember what day the Husband gets back this week. I don't think it's today.

I put my hair in a ponytail and stand on the scale. I curse. I sigh.

I move on.

I stretch and try to rub the sleep out of my eyes. I walk down the dark and silent hall to start rousing the troops. Two of the three are tired and cranky, and do not want to get out of bed. Chase wants desperately to be sick today. I refuse to allow this. The princess has 80s rock star hair. I remind her that she needs a bath before school, and silently pray there is enough time for it.

I go downstairs, heat up the leftover pancakes and smile, knowing how happy it will make Chase. Boy, that kid loves the pancakes. Within minutes, they are all seated in front of steaming pancakes that are dripping with maple syrup. Poor things, they all look half asleep.

A quick prayer is said. Pancakes are eaten. Spirits are lifted. Someone even tells a joke or two. I try to permanently stamp this moment in my memory.

Showers get taken. Lunches are made. Backpacks are packed. Coats and layers get put on. I hug and kiss each one, and promise to wave when the bus goes by. I smile inside, knowing they won't want want me to wave in a year or two. I am glad for it today.

Sixty-two minutes after my alarm clock went off, they walk out the door. I thank god for this alone time. I put on some good music. I workout hard. I sweat. I drink a lot of water. I sweat some more.

I sit down and read this blog and this blog, both of which inspire me to count my blessings.

And I think to myself, what a wonderful world.

Wishing and hoping

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Things I need right now:

  • A new purse
  • Another diet coke
  • Cookie dough
  • AN END TO THE FRICKIN' WRITER'S STRIKE
  • Warm weather
  • A billion dollars
  • New carpet in my basement
  • More camera toys
  • World peace
  • A dog
  • Lisa Marie's salsa chicken burritos
  • A cleaning lady
  • Cookie dough
  • Lower taxes (or no taxes at all, really)
  • A pedicure
  • Britney Spears to get her crap together so I don't have to hear about her every time the TV is on
  • Having The Husband in town for more than two days in a row
  • A new windshield
  • Girl's night out
  • One date with Colin Firth dressed as Mr. Darcy (wherein he stares at me longingly just like he did in The Movie)
  • Five hours to watch The Movie wherein he stares longingly
  • A private jet
  • More shoes
  • Internet access that is not schizophrenic and actually works when you go to use it
  • Condos in both New York City and Hawaii
  • Skin without freckles
  • Something with peanut butter and chocolate in it
  • Cookie dough with peanut butter and chocolate in it
  • For Bono to write a song about me
  • All my BFFs to come to Blogapalooza
  • A magic pill that will change my thighs from lard to hard
  • A private concert by Frank Sinatra (yes, I realize he'd have to come back from the dead. I still want it)
  • Photography classes from the great Nicole Hill
  • A good haircut
  • Unlimited access to the White House files on Kennedy and Area 51
  • Temperatures above 20 degrees.

Things I will actually get right now:

  • Another diet coke
  • Cookie dough with peanut butter and chocolate in it

Two out of 36 ain't bad.

Travel Swap and miscellany

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Kelly is hosting a little travel swap, and today is the last day to sign up. I really like getting more in the mail than bills and Viagra coupons, and a swap is just the ticket. Head over to her blog for all the details. I've done several of these, and they are always really fun.

P.S. If you haven't received the recipes, email me at stiesthoughts@gmail.com and I'll send them to you. I tried to remember everyone who wanted one, but in case I missed you, let me know. (I'm especially going to send one to you, Celia. There's no sense letting you get away with all those fauxmade dinners if the rest of us can't.)

Why I am Lucky (Surprise Guest Post)

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This is Josh (the “Husband”) writing a special guest post to Stie’s blog. Before I get on with this note, I want to acknowledge that this type of post is risky. Many will say that Christie is actually the author, writing in guise to fulfill egotistical tendencies or that we colluded to somehow increase her “readership”. Some readers may think that this is a clever ruse to “make-up” after a spat (I don’t think we have been in a fight recently…but for all I know, we may be in one right now). I want to make clear that that these or other ulterior motives were not the purpose of my post. I can assure you that she will be surprised and embarrassed when she reads this post. I hope she forgives me. Because this blog has become our electronic family record, I think this post is oddly appropriate.

I think I am one of the luckiest guys around because I found the partner that has the exact combination of characteristics to bring me the greatest happiness. Because I only knew Stie for only a short time before we were married, I did not or could not know the perfection of the match. I wish I could say that I had foresight and wisdom when I asked Christie to marry me, but I can’t…it was truly divine intervention that guided our decision. I will be eternally grateful that I acted on that intuition or inspiration, whatever you want to call it.

When we started out, I had the unfortunate mixture of ambition and lack of vision. In other words, I really wanted to get somewhere in life as fast as possible but had no idea where. These traits often lead me to be frustrated and unsatisfied. However, even in the beginning, Stie always believed in me. And, strangely, she still does even in times when I don’t or when I don’t measure up. I am sure some have rolled their eyes at some of our crazy decisions (which also tend to be the most life changing), but Stie can make anything work and is always 100 percent.

Stie has come a long way. When I first met her, she hung around the same group of friends that she had since she was 5 years old. She lived in one house her entire life. She hadn’t traveled widely... her 10 day trip to Chicago was the furthest she had ever been (she considered herself a native of Chicago for years after that trip). Our first move was a huge adjustment for her, it was difficult to navigate new areas, find new friends, and just feel comfortable…and we moved less than 15 miles away from her house.

Fourteen years later, I’ve lost count on the number of times we’ve moved but we’ve lived in 5 states, each in regions of the country that couldn’t be more different. But Stie has thrived! She has an uncanny ability to quickly acclimate to new situations and adapt to any social circumstances without being awkward. People are drawn to her because she is fun, authentic, and puts their needs above hers. She’s not the most “churchy” person I know, but she is one of the most Christian.

Stie manages all this while not being overwhelmed by her near single-parent status. I, fortunately, have found (through trial and error) a direction and career that I really enjoy and brings me satisfaction. Unfortunately for Stie, it requires significant demands of time which lead to sacrifice. There are months (like right this one) where I spend nights at the Marriott than at home. There are also times when I am home, but am not really there. Stie’s sheer capacity and ability to organize makes our house a place that I want to come home to. I attribute our kids’ cheerful dispositions and well-adjusted natures to the happy atmosphere Stie creates in our home. She is so strong and independent; I have learned to never underestimate her will.

Now, Stie has some crazy quirks, which I will continue to tease her about (you never know, maybe those will be the subject of another special blog post). But she is truly the most accomplished woman I know. She is beautiful, Stie gets even prettier as time goes on…I love having her as my trophy wife. I am so happy that she chooses to stay with me and creates calm out of the chaos that is my life. I would be lost without Stie. I love her more than I can tell her…but I should tell her more.

That is why I am lucky.

Salsa Chicken Burritos

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Lisa has given me permission to share her award-winning recipe. May your taste buds enjoy the party you will be giving them:

Salsa chicken burritos

Put frozen chicken breasts (boneless skinless) in your crockpot. I used 3-4 breasts. Dump in one jar of bottled salsa (Lisa uses Pace Picante medium. I went with the mild due to the wimpiness of the taste buds around here).

Fill the empty jar about halfway with water to rinse it out and add it to the crockpot.

Let it cook on low all day. The chicken falls apart and is so tender and flavorful. Pull it apart with a fork. Serve on warm tortillas with cheese and sour cream (or whatever toppings you want).

My children DEVOURED this and begged for seconds, even though they could see tomatoes, onions, and peppers. (Take that, Jessica Seinfeld!)

That has never before happened in the history of the world.

And that, dear internets, is why she won (that and the absolute simplicity of her no-fail, little effort entry that embodies my cooking skills completely).

**If you want the rest of the recipes, email me. I'm still waiting to hear back from the senders with their permission before I send any more out. I will compile them into one file and happily email you the recipes, rather than post them here. I got a TON. And they were all just awesome.